So I have a problem and maybe if anyone reads this they could give me some feedback on what I could do.
Here goes:
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years and while we've had our problems we're going strong despite the hiccups.
But my family is giving me hell. We've broken up a couple of times and the most recent time was because someone he'd known in primary (elementary) school moved back to town and he wanted to see if they had chemistry (he'd had a thing for her before she moved). I understood and was willing to step aside. The song Butterfly by Mariah Carey came to mind because of a line that says "Now I understand to hold you
I must open up my hands and watch you rise." But my family said I should forget about him.
She recently broke his heart by telling him that she had never cared for him in the first place and only started dating him because she was bored so needless to say they broke up and after giving it a month or so to deal he asked me if I wanted to get back together. I told him yes.
Now comes the dilemma:
Whenever any kind of moral debate comes up in our house (I live with my parents and two younger brothers) the rest of the family brings up the fact that he broke things off to try with her and act like he hurt them personally.
I know that my parents care about me but my question is should a relationship be between the two people involved or should family and friends be able to give their two cents no matter what the topic?
I mean I'm all for my parents looking out for me but I'm not a little kid any more. And regardless of what he did, it was to me not anyone in my family so if anyone has the right to be upset/angry/whatever it's me not my family......
Hopefully someone out there reads this because I don't know how many more times I can listen to their bullshit reasons as to how (other than the fact that they don't want to see me hurt) this has anything to do with them.
I think that your parents are just looking out for you. I also understand that you think it should only be between the two of you, but if you have ever asked them for their opinion on the situation then it means that you care about what they think.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I wouldn't have got back with him and I would have thrown a bit of a fit if he'd said that there was someone he wanted to try it out with. I would have said "You either break-up with me and go to her, or you stay with me?" but that's just me and gay relationships are quite complicated because it's the only relationship where both people can have a crush on the same person and go out with each others exes.
I'm not sure if any of what I just said then, but I hope some of it does.
-Joseph
www.josepheastwood.com
Yeah it makes sense.
ReplyDeleteIt's just I've known since we met that we're meant to be and so that's part of why I took him back.
The other thing is that in this instance I didn't ask their opinion I was just informing them that we were back together so that they knew what was going on and ever since its been this argument
Uhhhh...my opinion (and don't hate me) but your gut sounds like a total jerk. When you love someone you only love them! The feeling of wanting to test out a relationship with someone else doesn't exist. Yes I know relationships have their ups and downs--me and my boyfriend are like that too- but that doesn't give the excuse from him to do that.
ReplyDeleteI'm only saying this because I love you!!! Don't hate me >__<
I don't hate you Dom. I could never hate you. I know I'm missing things upstairs LOL. He often asks why I'm still with him but I just don't want to be one of those people who gives up on a relationship that easily. I guess I've always had the impression that you don't give up just because of hardships. I mean if it continues to happen then sure I won't stick around but as far as I know now it's in the past and it's going to stay there.
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